Retirement is a major life milestone that many people spend years planning and looking forward to. However, despite the importance of preparing for life after work, talking about retirement with your partner can often feel difficult.
Research by Moneybox (3 July 2026) revealed that 43% of over-55s have never discussed their retirement finances with anyone. Meanwhile, just 44% said they had spoken about retirement finances with their partner or spouse.
Avoiding these conversations could mean couples have very different expectations about when they will retire, how much they plan to spend, and what they want their later years to look like. It could also lead to missed opportunities to make the most of their retirement income.
Read on to discover why so many people find retirement conversations difficult, three practical tips for talking about retirement with your partner, and how a financial planner could support you.
Why can talking about retirement with your partner feel difficult?
Retirement planning can bring up some difficult emotions.
The Moneybox research found that 56% of UK adults worry about their retirement finances at least once a year, while 34% worry about them at least once a month.
Despite these concerns, fewer than half of those surveyed had discussed their retirement finances with their partner.
When asked how they felt about retirement, respondents said they felt:
- 18% confident
- 24% anxious
- 16% fearful
- 15% stressed
The research also highlighted some of the reasons why retirement planning can feel challenging. When asked what makes planning difficult:
- 14% said they were worried about getting older
- 22% citied a lack of knowledge
- 15% said they lacked confidence
In other words, talking about retirement with your partner can involve emotionally challenging subjects that you may feel uncomfortable addressing, even with the person closest to you.
However, while avoiding these conversations may provide short-term relief, it could make important financial decisions more difficult later.
Effective retirement planning is rarely about making one big decision. Instead it often involves making a series of smaller decisions over time. Having open and honest conversations with your partner could help ensure you’re both working towards a future that reflects your individual and shared goals.
3 practical tips for talking about retirement with your partner
If you feel awkward or unsure about discussing retirement finances with your partner, these practical tips could help you start the conversation.
Choose the right time to talk
Trying to have an important conversation when one of you is tired, distracted, or stressed may make the discussion more difficult.
Instead, set aside some dedicated time when you’re both relaxed and able to focus on the conversation without feeling rushed.
It may also help to frame the discussion as an opportunity to plan your future together rather than focusing immediately on finances.
You don’t need to cover everything in one conversation, either. Breaking the subject into smaller topics could make it feel more manageable.
For example, you could start by discussing:
- When you would each like to retire
- What you would like your retirement to look like
- How much income you may need
- What pensions and other assets you already have
Taking things one step at a time could make talking about retirement with your partner feel less overwhelming.
Start with your goals, hopes, and concerns
Jumping straight into pension values, investments and spreadsheets could make retirement planning feel technical and stressful.
Instead, start by discussing what you both want from your future.
The strongest financial plans are built around your priorities, values and aspirations, so understanding what matters most to each of your is an important first step.
You could ask each other questions such as:
- What does a fulfilling retirement look like to you?
- What are you most looking forward to?
- What are your biggest concerns about retirement?
- Where would you like to spend your time?
- Are there any major plans or experiences you would like to prioritise?
These conversations could highlight shared goals, as well as differences you may not have realised existed.
For example, you might both be looking forward to spending more time with your grandchildren. However, you may also dream of travelling extensively, while your partner would prefer to focus on home improvements or other projects.
You don’t need to agree on everything immediately. The first step is simply to start talking about retirement with your partner and develop a better understanding of each other’s expectations.
Build a shared picture of your finances
Once you’ve discussed what you both want from retirement, you can begin building a clearer picture of your financial situation.
Gathering your financial information in one place could help you understand what resources you have available and identify any areas that may need further attention.
You may want to review:
- Your State Pension forecasts
- Workplace and personal pension statements
- ISAs, investments, and savings
- Property and mortgage commitments
- Debts and regular expenditure
- Any other expected sources of future income
- Tax considerations and planned gifts
You may also need to consider factors that could affect your financial situation in the future, such as inflation, investment returns, and changes to your health or circumstances.
This is where working with a financial planner could prove particularly valuable.
How a financial planner could support your retirement planning
A financial planner can provide a dedicated opportunity for you and your partner to discuss your finances, retirement goals, and concerns.
They can help you understand your current financial position and explore whether you’re on track to achieve the retirement you want.
If you and your partner have different expectations or are struggling to reach a compromise, having a professional involved could also help you have mre productive conversations.
A financial planner can use cashflow modelling to explore different scenarios and show how certain decisions could affect your future finances.
For example, you may be able to model the potential impact of:
- Retiring at different ages
- Changing your planned level of spending
- Making additional pension contributions
- Taking a larger or smaller income in retirement
- Changing your investment strategy
Seeing different scenarios could help you and your partner make more informed decisions and create a financial plan that works for both of you.
Get in touch
Talking about retirement with your partner can sometimes feel uncomfortable, but starting the conversation could help you better understand each other’s goals, concerns, and expectations for the future.
At Jordan Financial Management, we can help you take a step back, understand your financial position, and create a plan based around the retirement you want to enjoy.
If you’d like support with your retirement planning, please get in touch to find out how we can help.
Please note: This article is for general information only and does not constitute advice. The information is aimed at individuals only.
All information is correct at the time of writing and is subject to change in the future.
Please do not act based on anything you might read in this article. All contents are based on our understanding of HMRC legislation, which is subject to change.
The Financial Conduct Authority does not regulate cashflow planning or tax planning.
A pension is a long-term investment not normally accessible until 55 (57 from April 2028). The fund value may fluctuate and can go down, which would have an impact on the level of pension benefits available. Past performance is not a reliable indicator of future performance.
The tax implications of pension withdrawals will be based on your individual circumstances. Thresholds, percentage rates, and tax legislation may change in subsequent Finance Acts.
Workplace pensions are regulated by The Pensions Regulator.
The value of your investments (and any income from them) can go down as well as up and you may not get back the full amount you invested. Past performance is not a reliable indicator of future performance.
Investments should be considered over the longer term and should fit in with your overall attitude to risk and financial circumstances.
Your home may be repossessed if you do not keep up repayments on a mortgage or other loans secured on it.
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